Where Forth Art My HAIR TWIN?

Please excuse the title of this post. I'm knee deep in teaching Shakespeare this semester (smiles). They say that everyone has a twin out here in this big, beautiful world. I've yet to see my twin, but some of my friends and associates say that she is out there. Well, I hope my twin also has the same hair, so we can spend hours sharing our beauty secrets. I wish my hair twin was someone rich and famous. Then, I could be paid to be her hair twin. But, in all seriousness, what exactly is the benefit of finding your hair twin?

Desperately seeking a hair twin.

Hair twins can be a mirror to our hair regimen. A hair twin helps us to see our hair in a different light and gain insight into what we're doing right and what we're doing wrong. A hair twin doesn't merely appear to have our same hair, but something in the texture, sheen, an overall look screams "hair twin".



Hair twins can challenge us to "compete" with them to get better length retention or overall healthy hair. How many times have I labored over my hair twin's routine and tried to figure out what she's doing right and I'm doing wrong. Perhaps my twin has some super power-- "Grow hair, activate!" No, perhaps she wears her hair in protective styles longer OR she detangles a lot better than me. Whatever the difference, check out her routine and see if it works!


Hair twins can give us great ideas for wonderful styles. Pretty much, I am shameless about my hair envy. I have pulled up pics of my hair twin and watched vids of all her tutorials on YouTube. I'd probably be a stalker if I didn't admire her from afar.


Hair twins make us feel like we're not an anomaly. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being unique. In fact, being different sets us a part from the rest of the pack. But, those YouTube videos sure do make many of us feel like our hair is NOTHING like Hair Expert So and So who never seems to have a bad hair day; hair grows over night; and every style seems to come out perfectly. No, our hair twin reminds us of the imperfections of life. We learn to laugh at our flaws and even celebrate them.

So, tell me dear reader, have you spotted your hair twin? 

Treat Hair Like a Precious Fabric & See Great Results!!

Often, I have seen natural experts compare natural hair to a precious fabric. This is an excellent analogy and allows those of us "hard headed" naturals to think clearly about how to automate our hair care. It perturbs me to hear people complain about how difficult it is to care for natural hair. I have seen blogs and forums  posting comments after comments about how hard it is to care for curly, kinky, and/or extra dry hair. Moreover, some naturals are so frustrated by their hair that they find that it is easier to chemically straighten and/or wear hair extensions and weaves. While I believe that each person must do what is best for him or her, I also believe that natural hair is not that difficult to maintain. Treat your natural hair like a precious fabric and you will be pleasantly surprised with the results.

How are natural hair and special fabrics alike?

1. Both natural hair and special fabric have to be HAND washed. This means that the cleansing process has to be thorough yet gentle. Twisting or tugging can cause permanent damage resulting in tears, splitting, and shedding. Think of your best hand wash only fabric. ONLY gentle washing by hand keeps the fabric from becoming to stretched or mangled. The same is true with natural hair. Cleansing hair in sections (the use of butterfly clips, loose twists or braids) keeps hair from being tangled. I always cleanse my hair in loose twists and this reduces any unnecessary breakage and shedding.

2. Both natural hair and special fabric require SPECIAL PRODUCTS. I will not start the natural vs. commercial product debate, but my point here is to use products that are tailored especially for YOUR hair. Every head of hair is different, so this means using products that agree with your scalp and hair. Be mindful of ingredients that works well with your hair's special needs (hair type, porosity, etc.). For example, I use primarily products that contain shea butter, castor oil, grapeseed oil, jojoba oil, aloe vera, etc.

3. Both natural hair and special fabric are AIR DRIED. Typically, special fabrics do not get arbitrarily tossed into a dryer. But, rather, they are air dried. Heat styling should be kept to a bare minimum. Why? Because excessive heat styling can break down the bonds of natural hair causing irreversible damage. Opt to air dry natural hair. Use a soft white tee to speed the drying process. This is called "plopping". Plopping safely dries natural hair. I "plop" my hair every time I cleanse it and my hair always dries fluffy and soft.

4. Both natural hair and special fabric need to be protected. Imagine you know that it will be a rainy day and you are wearing  your best suede fabric. What do you do? You spray a protectant spray over it to protect it from weather damage. The same is true for natural hair. Protect your hair from nature's elements. On windy days wear a scarf or hat to keep your hair from being blown causing breakage. Wrap your hair on fiercely cold days to keep the moisture from escaping and causing excessive dryness. Even hot, sunny days can cause damage. Taking special precautions can save your hair in the long run.

Sometimes we do things to our hair that causes cumulative damage. Likewise, it is the little things that can result in length retention. I have learned to approach length retention one step at a time. This means that every single thing that I do can either cause length retention or excessive shedding and breakage. I choose to treat my hair like a special fabric and just as a fabric can be preserved, so can my hair. I hope these tips were just as helpful to you as they have been for me.

Dear Reader, what other tips can you share?

Resisting the Urge to Re-Twist: Roll, Tuck, Pin& Shake!!!

I've been feeling a little blah lately about my weekly twisting routine. I do enjoy the benefit of a protective style that lasts me about a week. I have fine, fickle threads that like to escape into a tumble of fuzziness after over a week. Also, there is something serene about my weekly hair washing sessions. Since using Chagrin Valley shampoo bars my hair has been less tangled and my scalp is clean and healing from my seborrhea dermatitis. So, I make these hair wash days into my spa treatment complete with a deep treatment pree poo every week. I'll go into more detail about my revised hair regimen and growth plan in the next post.

My twist outs used to consist of unravelling my twists that I had in for a week, then re-twisting to get the same definition the next day and the day after. But, my fine strands would do a tangle job like you wouldn't believe and I'd end up with hair fighting with itself. So, I asked myself what could I do to get beautiful definition AND reduce the hair tangles? I came up with my tuck and pin method.

Before bedtime I spritzed my hair with my water, aloe vera juice, and oils mixed. Then, I added some hair milk to each section. Next, I rolled my hair on each side and pinned them down. I placed my satin head scarf on my head and I went to sleep.

In the morning I unpinned and unrolled each section. Then, I used my fingers to separate and style the sections. I shook my hair in a downward motion to add volume.
The result? Soft, bouncy small spiral curls that are presentable. No more re-twisting for me. I'm happy with the results.

Shea Moisture Cowash vs Nubian Heritage Cowash: Product Reviews

"It's been a long time I shouldn't have left you without a dope beat to step to, step to.." Hah, hah.. I love Big Daddy Kane. Some of you younger people know that line from the sample in an Aaliyah song. Anyway, I've been on a little hiatus as I've been busy with my son, who is a senior in high school. So, my apologies to my followers and those of you, who have enjoyed my musings of being a "forgotten natural".

Recently, I hopped aboard the new product train and purchased first, the Shea Moisture Co wash and then, the Nubian Heritage Indian Hemp and Tamanu Cowash. I am a BIG Shea Moisture and Nubian Heritage fan. These companies, which from my understanding are sister companies, produce some of the BEST natural products around and they are quite affordable. Now, usually I'm not an avid cowasher, but the allure of trying these products were great. Here's a breakdown on the comparison and contrast between the two.

Shea Moisture                                vs. Nubian Heritage
-silk protein and black soap                -indian hemp, tamanu, and monoi oils
-thick and creamy consistency              -creamy but not as thick
-tropical scent                                     -perfume scent
-8 fl oz bottle                                      -12 fl oz bottle
-vitamin e                                           - vitamin e, pro vitamin b-5
                                                         - garlic extract

Both products have similar ingredients including: shea butter, mango butter, willow bark extract, kaolin clay, coconut oil, neem oil, jojoba oil, grapeseed oil, aloe vera juice, etc.

In theory both of these products should work very well for my hair. After all, I've used several products from both companies with no issues. Well, with the exception of my hair's abhorrence to the Shea Moisture Raw Shea butter hair products. My hair can't stand something in that product line for some reason, but my hair does wonderfully with the Black Soap, Coconut/Hibiscus, and Yucca/Aloe hair product lines. So, imagine my dismay when I tried the Shea Moisture Coconut Hibiscus and my hair acted like I had given it something foreign. I was SO disappointed. Thinking that perhaps it was a fluke, I used Shea Moisture cowash three times over a two week period. Each time my hair was initially soft, but then became tangled and my scalp began to itch. Disappointed, I saw the Nubian Heritage cowash and decided to buy and try it, hoping for better results. Whomp, whomp, whomp.... The Nubian Heritage cowash didn't itch my scalp as badly as the Shea Moisture cowash, but my hair was temporarily moisturized and became tangled again!

Unfortunately, my final rating for both products is 1 hairball for the awesome ingredients, but not so good on performance. My scalp felt itchy and my hair was only temporarily moisturized. I will NOT be re-purchasing either cowash, because my Chagrin Valley shampoo bars cleanse my hair tremendously reducing itch and imparting shine on my hair. Although Shea Moisture and Nubian Heritage produce awesome products, these cowashes were a bust. I ended up cleansing and conditioning my hair with my shampoo bars and my hair went back to being normal, soft, and shiny. If you have sensitive scalp, then proceed with caution using either of these cowashes.

Fighting Product Junkyism: Don't Believe the Hype!

Every since become natural I have been overwhelmed by the plethora of hair products. It seems as though every month a new product line comes out. Products to make your curls pop, shine, shake, and bounce. Then, there are the products that promise to repair and rejuvenate. With so many products to choose from what's a wide eyed natural to do?

If you are just transitioning or a long term natural, the lure to purchase the latest (and supposed) greatest is tempting. Whether you buy online or in the store, glitzy, styled advertising is waiting to get your hard earned buck. The worst part is when you're on a natural hair forum, YouTube, or hair site and someone does a product review praising how awesome the product is.

The downside of all this overhyped product persuasion is that often times people are spending money that could best be suited to do something else with. Now, before all the product junkies start rolling their necks and waving their Denman brushes in solidarity, please here me out. There is absolutely nothing wrong with treating yourself to a nice product or replenishing your product stash. But, when your savings account is low and you're bathroom cabinets are full, there is definitely something wrong.

How do you keep your sanity, dollars, and level head in a commercial society? There are several ways to be a diva on a budget and have fabulous hair, skin, and nails without breaking the bank.

#1. Shop ONLY when there are SIGNIFICANT discounts or sales. A measely 10% is not enough to get out your credit card to spend. Look for sales that give you the most "bang" for your buck. Bogos such as buy one get one free are awesome because they allow you to stock up at a deep discount.

#2. Shop only when you NEED to replenish a STAPLE product. So, your favorite conditioner has run out and it's time to restock. Now that's a need versus a want. Conditioner and stylers are really important to curlies. You don't want to be caught without it.

#3. Use special occasions such as birthdays, Christmas, and even Valentine's Day to let loved ones know what you REALLY want. You know you'd rather have that hair product set over some cheesy gift you don't want. So, tactfully tell your significant other, family member, and friends or drop big hints about your product preferences.

#4. Hold product swap meet ups or get togethers. This allows you to meet, greet, socialize and obtain those cool products that you've been meaning to try. This is a cost effective and won't have your piggy bank emptied.

Curlies, what are some ways you fight product junkyism and save money?

Natural Hair Wars: What IS Natural and What Is NOT?

So, I was reading a post the other day on a hair forum and someone posted about how someone stated that people who put styling products on their hair are not natural. Hold up! What? The poster went on to say that her friend was saying that people who naturally have curls shouldn't have to put products in them to define them. She went on to share that her friend felt that natural is a big, dry afro with no product. Hmmm... Interesting. After reading this story I went on to think about what exactly do we mean by "natural"?

Before I talk about what I define as natural, I must digress back to my relaxer days, so we can compare. Every 6-8 weeks I would be patting my hair waiting for the time when I could get to the hair salon and get my touch up. I could feel my roots, which were puffing up and coarse unlike the rest of my relaxed hair which was straight. The two textures would battle it out before I could get my touch up and straighten my kinks into submission. I could smell the pungent odor of the relaxer. When my stylist parted my hair I could feel the "slap, slap, slap" of the brush as she applied the relaxer to my new growth. After so many minutes I could feel the burn and sometimes fire on my scalp before it had to be rinsed off then followed up with a neutralizing shampoo. This was a cycle that I followed since middle school up until 4 yrs ago when I decided to let my hair grow naturally.

So, now that brings me back to the definition of natural. In the natural hair community we have two schools of thought. There is the school of thought that believes natural is to wear the hair void of any relaxers. This means simply that whether you straighten, henna, or color your hair it is still natural because you're not using a relaxer. Then, there is the other school of thought that believes to alter the hair in ANY way using heat, color, or henna, etc then you aren't natural. Well, I belong to the no relaxer then you're natural school of thought. All those rules just simply make no sense to me. I'd rather keep it simple. If you're not using relaxer and you've transitioned, then that's your natural texture.

How many times have I encountered a Negative Nelly? Probably more often when I first transitioned. The comments were more geared toward asking me why don't I cut my hair then anything else. It's interesting how YOUR hair can become a topic of someone else's conversation. I remember one time someone asked why I wear scarves on my head so much and am I religious. I simply said "Because I like them." I could've done a variety of things, which brings me to dealing with the natural "Nazis".

I've come up with a short list for battling the natural hair wars and triumphing over natural "Nazis".

When someone wants to put THEIR own opinion on what you do with YOUR hair you can choose ONE or MORE of the following responses:

#1. Smile and say "Thank you". Sometimes idiots just need love. As the saying goes, kill them with kindness.

#2. Look through them and don't say anything. The dummy will be wondering why the silence is so deafening.

#3. Look up at their hair and make a weird "what is that face". This will have them trying to think what is going on with their own head.

#4. Laugh and change the subject. The old blow off usually works and the clueless ninny won't realize that you just basically told her to have a seat without actually saying it.

#5. Say "And this matters because?" Look the person dead in the eye and act like you're waiting for a response. If they do respond interrupt and say "Dang, I gotta go do something. Buh bye!" Now they're standing there looking stupid or if they're on the phone all they hear is silence.

Readers, how do you deal with the Negative Nellies and their comments about YOUR hair?

An Alternative to Hair Grease:Sunny Isle Hair Pomades

A few months ago I was in my local health store searching for some Jamaican Pimento oil and I came across Sunny Isle Rosemary Oil Pomade. You can find Sunny Isle products on their website at http://www.sunnyislejamaicanblackcastoroil.com/. Looking at the ingredients I became convinced that this might be a good product to buy. The ingedients are 100% natural beeswax, Jamaican black castor oil, extra virgin olive oil, extra virgin Jamaican coconut oil, jojoba oil, and rosemary essential oil. Opening the jar my senses were hit with a STRONG herbal, rosemary scent. The color is an herbal color that looks like a brown/ green mixture. You can see small beads of herbs mixed inside the pomade.

Initially, I attempted to part my hair and use the pomade to twist my hair. My curly/ coily hair resisted and my twists began to unravel. So, I tried again cocktailing the pomade with a smidgen of the Shea Moisture Curling Souffle. Eureeka! This combo worked awesome and my twists stayed. Not only that, but after putting a little pomade on my scalp, it felt really refreshed.

I have been using the Sunny Isle Rosemary Pomade for a couple months and I LOVE it. I've been able to achieve moisturized twists and I use a little on my ends to keep them in good shape. This pomade is a great alternative for those who are sensitive to petroletum products. Contrary to popular belief old school petroletum products didn't work for everyone and they sure don't work for me. The best part is that it lasts a LONG time and it is healthy for the hair. Did you know that rosemary has been proven to contribute to hair growth?

Since using the Sunny Isle Rosemary Hair Pomade I've noticed moisturized, shiny, HAPPY hair. My hair doesn't feel greasy or weighed down. A little bit goes a LONG way! This wonderful pomade didn't irritate my sensitive scalp. The herbal scent does linger a little, so if you're sensitive to smells then this may not be the pomade for you.

The Sunny Isle pomades made with Jamaican Black Castor Oil also comes in Ylang Ylang and Lavendar. You can also order the Jamaican Black Castor oil with these oil mixtures. They are all natural and affordable.

What products do you recommend for preserving protective styles?